Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Mine's Bigger Than Yours - Create Your Own Fantasy

Within the walls of the Tower of London - Photo Alden Smith

There is a wonderful classic, iconic and very funny scene in the Crocodile Dundee movie where he is threatened by a young guy with a switch blade. Crocodile Dundee laughs and says something along the lines of "That's not a knife; THIS! is a knife! " and produces a Bowie knife the size of his forearm. Although the film is a comedy I feel this scene is 'up there' with the - "Feeling lucky punk?" - "Make my day" - dialogue of Clint Eastward.
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I wonder what scenario and dialogue a film scrip writer would write using this majestic cannon in the above photograph on one the hand and say a small Derringer pistol on the other? How would it be played within say the Monty Python or Fawlty Towers genre? or a more serious genre?
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COME ON BLOGGERS - MAKE MY DAY AND WRITE ME ONE !
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Here is the history of the gun:
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" This gun, which weighs 5 ¼ tons, was probably made in the Low Countries in 1607, commissioned by the Knights of Malta. It is richly decorated with a variety of images representing the Order's religious and humanitarian role. It was brought to England around 1800 and lay at the Royal Arsenal in Woolwich until 1962, when it was transferred to the Tower.
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John Hall of Dartford, Kent, made the carriage for the gun in 1827 on the orders of the Duke of Wellington, Master General of the Ordnance. It shows the Arms of Malta and scenes from the history of the island. The breech of the gun rests on an iron quoin in the shape of a Maltese dog.
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A programme of conservation of both gun and carriage was undertaken in 2003 – 04 at the Royal Armouries, Fort Nelson."
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4 comments:

Katherine said...

Hmmm, I know it well, it took my eye when I saw it, and the outrageousness of the pattern and paintwork delighted me. Especially the cute Maltese dog. But I can't for the life of me think up some caption...unless it's ... nah... still thinking.

Tillerman said...

Yes it is a bit difficult but I have just thought of a senario - the person with the Derringer is a woman who on seeing the man with the cannon says "come here big boy I really like your gun" and proposes to him on the spot. They marry and make a million dollars travelling the world with a circus as a human cannon ball act. They take turns being fired from the cannon. The man never fires a blank and they live happily ever after with their children named????? and here the inspiration leaves me ... What are some very clever witty funny names for their children????

Tillerman said...

Oh yes, I forgot to mention they have a robust little dog called Trigger who can run with the speed of a bullet.

privacyforme said...

Crocodile Dundee is one my favourite movie after back to the future :D his character is very funny and make me remember when i was younger and i like it very much.